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For those of you too lazy to read part 1, a brief recap of what has happened up to this point: His Excellency Lord Monkeyhands, CEO of Galactic Invertebrates, failed to tell our most important client about a project that I had been working on for TH... [Read the full post]
Man, there were some killer captions this time. I had a tough time picking. (Mrs. Diesel will occasionally pick a favorite or two, but lately she's been making me do the grunt work. Like this is my blog or something.)Here are the ten finalists. Vote ... [Read the full post]
Note: This story, concerning my final days at Galactic Invertebrates, is long overdue. I only waited this long because until recently I was still doing consulting work for them, and I didn't want to needlessly antagonize the little asswipes. Also,... [Read the full post]
Yes, believe it or not, having put the cap on the Rocky series, old Sly is now resurrecting the Rambo franchise. When last we left Rambo, he was assisting the Mujahideen in their struggle to throw rocks at the Soviet army fleeing Afghanistan. Now, ... [Read the full post]
Greetings, wormfood!I apologize for my long absence. Diesel's estate seems to have developed a bit of a hobbit problem, and my lord insists that I deal with them. He won't admit it, but I suspect that he still feels a little bad about accidentally ... [Read the full post]
Apologies to Beth for the title of this post....Ok, I've upgraded Humor-Blogs.com from MySQL to SQL Server, and I think I've worked out most of the bugs. The commenting app on this site should be working now as well. Sorry if you had trouble postin... [Read the full post]
Recently I came across a very disturbing news item on Yahoo. Here is a quote:"More and more foods bear a mishmash of warnings that they might accidentally contain ingredients that could seriously sicken people with food allergies. Yet there are sign... [Read the full post]
Sadly, Sparrow's insult to my manhood took first place this week. Sparrow, you may display the prestigious In Your Face award:In second place was Brad's caption:All were in agreement that this was the weakest "Celebrity Jeopardy" in recent memory.A... [Read the full post]
I just learned from Slippy Lane that NBC is planning to cancel Journeyman, which I find astounding. Evidently what we need more than an intelligently written and well acted show with compelling characters and original plot lines is American Gladiato... [Read the full post]
This morning the following headline popped up on Yahoo:Castro says he's too unhealthy to speakI couldn't help but laugh at the poor sick bastard. I'm sorry, what was that you said? Something about being too wealthy to pee? Could you speak up a lit... [Read the full post]
Man, it's getting hard to pick these things. 160+ captions? Are you kidding me? I'm going to have to start holding runoff elections to pick the front-runners. Or maybe delegate the selection to some reliable group of people, like Iowa.Anyway, her... [Read the full post]
So here's something you didn't know about me: I don't know jack about computers."Wait a minute," you say. "Aren't you, like, a computer programmer?"Ok, first of all, I'm a software developer. "Computer programmer" is a term left over from when com... [Read the full post]
First of all, thanks to everybody who responded to yesterday's post and tried to assure me that I'm completely normal. That's total bullocks, of course, but thanks. I mean, we all have our remote-control-in-the-freezer moments, but trust me, I take... [Read the full post]
Newcomers to this blog may get the impression that I think I'm smarter than everybody else. For example, I've suggested that author Mark Halperin wrote his bestselling opus The Truth Machine "in seventh grade study hall." I've ridiculed parents who... [Read the full post]
Occasionally when I write one of my brilliant political missives someone leaves a comment like this one:Very good site. Thank you:-) farm porn mother son porn dragonball porn lindsay lohan porn free porn samples home porn free porn passwords tara rei... [Read the full post]
This week wyo once again trounced the competition with a caption that perfectly fit the dumb guy look on my face while simultaneously poking fun at Johnny Depp's history of collaboration with Tim Burton.Congratulations, wyo! You may display this cus... [Read the full post]
Just a quick post to let you know what's going on around here lately. Several of you have asked, "WTF is up with the comment thingy?"To which I respond, "Well, can you be more specific? There are a lot of things up with the 'comment thingy', as you ... [Read the full post]
Greetings, thralls! I'm at the Snark today with a post that I wrote after finding some neat mushrooms in my backyard. I'll be back here tomorrow with some helpful tips about what not to plant in your garden. And don't forget, this Friday I'll post ... [Read the full post]
Wow, where does the time go? According to Steve Miller, it keeps slippin' slippin' slippin' into the future, but then he also spoke of the pompitous of love, so that tells you how much he knows.2008. What is up with that? When I was growing up, it... [Read the full post]
Sorry I never got around to posting yesterday; I was a bit under the weather. Or maybe it was the half bottle of Southern Comfort. Anyway, I was under something.So Happy New Year and stuff. You'll be relieved to know that Huey Lewis has been decla... [Read the full post]
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